Ed's Game Room: Pokémon Blue Version
by thebestkindofstupid
Summary: The Eds discover YouTube and decide to cash in on the fad of playing video games online to make ad revenue. That's right: Ed, Edd n Eddy playing video games. What a concept! In this story, they're playing Pokémon Blue Version with Squirtle as the starter Pokémon. An OC named Dave is also there because without an actual gamer, they'd be lost. Rated T for video game violence.
1. Hoppip, I Choose--Wait What? 04

_Ed's Game Room_

The Eds Play _Pokémon Blue Version_ [Part One]

"Hoppip, I Choose––Wait What?" (#4)

Written by thebestkindofstupid/Reginald Konga

**Author's Notes: I have a lot of author's notes here. I believe I'm posting this story on the 5-year anniversary of the Great Clement playing Sonic games on YouTube. I have nothing else to add to that.**

**The Eds' playthrough of **_**Super Mario Galaxy**_** (which is on hiatus) can be found on my profile here on fan fiction dot net, but it's not as good as this story, in my opinion. I thought it was necessary to split these playthroughs up into their own stories for several reasons. If you are trying to read them in the proper order, you can go by the number in parenthese, so the "(#4)" in the title of this chapter means that this is the fourth chapter.**

**This is where I've hopefully improved the story. I've ditched script formatting. I'm also going to allow all three Eds to play, but that won't take full effect until the game really starts. By which, I mean, you'll to wait until the Eds conquer the Pewter City gym. Then, things get different. I might also being doing the gyms out of order because I'd like to do a Red Version walkthrough for my own purposes, and I'd like to do the gyms in that game in the proper order.**

**I've also discovered that Team Omicron is an original Pokémon Rom Hack that looks awesome. Too bad I'll never get around to fixing up my Windows, so I can play it (the Mac version is likely inferior). I'm so fascinated by the idea of Team Asgard and Team Olympus that I wish I had created it.**

**Onward, enjoy this story. It was a lot of work.**

**Story thus far: After discovering the concept of playing video games on the Internet to make ad revenue, the Eds decided to play **_**Super Mario Galaxy 2**_**. After giving up on that, they decided to play **_**Pokémon**_**.**

"Hello, pigeons," Eddy said to his YouTube audience, "this is your good-lookin' host Eddy. Joining me today are Double D…"

"Salutations, YouTubers," Double D said to the camera.

Eddy continued, "…and Ed."

"My name is Ed!" Ed yelled into the camera.

"Hi," said another individual, "My name is Dave. I don't know how I got on this channel, but I can't complain."

Eddy then said, "So, Dave, tell the nice people at home what game we'll be playing today."

Dave explained, "Well, Nintendo released this thing called a Game Boy Player, which can be attached to the bottom of a Nintendo Game Cube to play Game Boy, Game Boy Color, and Game Boy Advanced games. Now, I was originally going to have to guys play through _Pokémon Yellow Version_, where Pikachu is your starter Pokémon, but that would require me erasing my save file, and I just can't do that. However, I bought _Pokémon Blue Version_ a few months back, and didn't get very far, so that's what we'll be playing today. I've also gotten to the third gym in _Pokémon Red Version_, and––"

"Sheesh," Eddy said, "What a mouth-full!"

"Hey!" Dave uttered after feeling somewhat insulted.

"So, if you guys and gals at home want us to tackle Pokémon Yellow, donate to the Kickstarter project below. There are even chances to get fabulous prizes, like one of Ed's gym socks."

"Actually," Dave said, "I think I'd rather have a Kickstarter for you guys to do the original _Pokémon Sapphire Version_ without my having to erase my current save file. I feel people would be more likely to donate to that."

"Okay," Eddy said, "we'll edit this later." He cleared his voice and said, "So, you if want us to do _Pokémon Sapphire Version_, just donate to the Kickstarter in the description box below."

"Shall I start the game, Eddy?" Double D asked.

"Sure, why not?" Eddy answered. The video footage of the Eds was now in the lower-right corner of the screen, taking up roughly 10% of the said screen. Another larger example of footage was in the upper-left corner, and that was the footage of the game. The GameCube start-up screen came on.

"Ah, yes, the GameCube. I love the GameCube," Dave said.

The GameCube then gave a "game disc could not be read" error message.

"Oh, shoot, I forgot to tell you: The disc that goes with the Game Boy Player that I have is scratched up, so I have to keep turning off and turning on the Game Cube."

A short while later, the Game Boy start-up screen appeared on the television and then left, meaning the game could be played. "Here we go," Dave said.

After the Game Freak logo and a copyright screen left the screen, the Eds and Dave saw the opening sequence where Gengar fights a Jigglypuff. Eddy commented, "Woah, I'm actually impressed. I thought the graphics were going to be really bad like the NES."

"Just FYI, Gengar is fighting a Nidoran in _Red Version_," Dave added.

"Why are there three copyright dates," Double D asked.

"I'm glad you asked, Double D," Dave explained. picking up a magazine with the Squirtle Evolutionary line on the cover. "According this _retro Gamer_ magazine, Pokémon Red and Green didn't do so well in Japan when they were first released in February 1996. They didn't peak in popularity until the summer of 1997. Then, they came to American in '98. As for 1995, that's likely when they got the patent for the name Pokémon because Capsule Monsters was too difficult to trademark."

Double D said, "You certainly seem to know your stuff, sir."

Eddy then pressed start. "If you guys are done blabbin', we've got a game to play."

"Don't click the continue op––Oh, great, now we've gotta restart."

After resetting the GameCube several more times, the Eds were able to start the real game. Prof. Oak started to introduce the player to the world of Pokémon.

"Does this guy say anything important?" Eddy asked, impatiently.

"No, but he does introduce the player to Pokémon," said Dave. Professor Oak then asks the player what his name is. Eddy enters in his name in all caps. "Wait, dude, you should probably not enter your name in all caps…" Dave said. "Wait… Double D, was Professor Oak speaking in all caps?"

Double D shrugged his shoulders.

"Eh, it doesn't matter," Eddy said. He then finalized his name into the computer.

Professor Oak then said, "Ah, so your name is EDDY."

"I told you so," Dave said.

"Shut up," Eddy commanded.

Professor Oak then started to introduce the player's rival. Dave misquoted him in a speedy voice, "This is my grandson. He's been your rival since you were a baby. Erm, what was his name again?"

"Wait, what?" Eddy asked.

"Didn't I tell you?" Dave wondered. "You get to name your rival whatever you want."

"Cool!" Double D and Eddy said.

"Just for your information, he's referred to as Blue by the Internet and game developers for clarity's sake. Plus, he's a jerk, so most people name him after someone they hate."

Double D said, "Well, obviously, we'll be naming him Kevin. I mean, we could beat around the bush all day, but it won't change the fact that we're inevitably going to name him Kevin."

Eddy started typing in the _K_ and the _E_ in all caps. "You should probably press B and switch to lower case," Dave reminded him.

"ERRGH," Eddy grunted before doing so. "There, your majesty, it's in lower case."

"Thank you," Dave said sincerely.

Professor Oak then said, "I remember now! His name is Kevin." Professor Oak then tells the player that their very own Pokémon adventure is about to begin.

"What does the trainer do first on his Pokémon adventure? He plays _Super Mario World_, of course," Dave mocked.

"Is there anything to do in this room?" Eddy asked.

"Go over to the PC and get your free potion," Dave said.

"Why would he have a potion in his PC anyway?" Double D commented. "It's not like he was a Pokémon trainer before this."

"A potion in his PC?" Eddy asked.

"Oh, I guess I should clarify. The player's PC stores items you don't want cluttering your inventory. These items are things like Potions, which restore your health, Pokéballs which let you capture Pokémon with a certain percentile catch rate, and a repel, which keeps weak Pokémon away. Another Someone's PC stores Pokémon because you can only have 6 Pokémon in you party, but you'll see."

Ed then said, "That was a great exposition dump, Dave!"

"Um," Dave said confusedly, "thank you?"

"You're welcome," said Ed.

For clarity's sake, the player's character in Pokémon Blue Version shall henceforth be referred to as Red, and the rival in this game will be referred to as Blue.

Red's mother tells her son that all boys leave home someday because "It said so on T.V."

Dave mocked the game, "I love how she's letting her only child leave home because of something she saw on T.V."

"Wow, seriously?!" Eddy asked.

"Yeah, that's what it says," said Dave.

Red starts watching Television. "You know," said Dave, "I wonder what movie they're referencing here. Boys on train tracks…"

"Isn't it obvious?" Ed said.

"What?" Dave asked.

"Oop, I forgot. What happens at Gravy Con stays at Gravy Con."

"You're a moron, Ed!" Eddy complained.

Red walks outside. He makes his way to the house to the right of his and reads the sign. "Kevin's House" it says.

Dave said, "I can't believe they put a sign next to the house, and they only specified the name of the child who lives there, not the adult who pays for the house."

"Wait, what?" Eddy said. Red read the sign again. I didn't mean for that sentence to come out that way.

"See? It says Kevin's house," Dave said.

"Wow, is it like that for Red's house?" Double D asked.

"Yeah, man," Dave said.

Red looked at the sign next to his house. "Well, I'll be," Eddy said. "Maybe that's how it is in Japan."

Double then started to say, "Eddy, I sincerely doubt––"

"I knew it was wrong as soon as I said it," Eddy interrupted his friend.

Red walked into Blue's house and talks to Blue's sister.

"You know what?" Dave said, "This is heavily implied to be his sister, and his mother is nowhere to be seen. That means the senile Professor Oak must have custody of his grandson and granddaughter."

"Where's the girl trainer?" Ed asked.

"Uhh, I don't know how, uhh, to answer that, Ed," Dave stuttered.

Red goes to Professor Oak's lab and meets up with Blue, who says that "Gramps isn't here." Red then goes to Professor Oak's PC and starts reading an e-mail from the Indigo Plateau.

Dave then said, "Barges into people's homes… steals people's belongings… reads other people's e-mails… our protagonist, ladies and gentlemen!"

"What's the Indigo Plateau, exactly?" asked Double D.

"That's the end game. It houses the Elite Four, where you must beat four people who are essentially gym leaders without a single trip to the Pokémon Center. It's rough, but experts make it sound too easy because they're…"

Suddenly, the audio was replaced with a random Internet video. Eddy then said, "Woah, man, you can't say that."

"You're right. We should probably edit that out. Folks, I didn't say anything dirty. It just was kind of offensive."

If one were to scroll down, one would see a comment from Dave which read, "I like how you left out the part where I referred to Pokémon experts as _Code Lyoko_ fanboys."

Red then leaves Professor Oak's lab and heads north. "Where do I go to get my Pokémon."

"You seriously don't know?!" Dave asked.

"No," Eddy said, "I don't."

"You really should better prepare for this game," Dave said.

"Double D," Eddy addressed his friend, "how do you prepare for these playthroughs?"

Angrily, Double D replied, "By doing hours of pain-staking research. I was once up all night reading about EV Training."

"Do you understand EV Training?" Dave asked.

"No," Double D replied.

"Neither do I…" Dave said.

"Okay," Eddy said, "so where do I go?"

"Go north of here. When you enter the tall grass, Professor Oak will come by and say,…" Dave then sang, "'It's dangerous to go alone; take one of these!" to the tune of that Star Bomb song with Egoraptor.

Red walks into the grass (the only exit in Pallet Town that doesn't involve swimming or surfing), but Professor Oak stops him, just as Dave had explained. Oak states that it is dangerous to walk into tall grass because wild Pokémon might appear. He goes on to say that Red needs his own. He walks Red back to the lab.

When Red arrives back in the lab, Blue says that he's fed up with waiting for a Pokémon. Professor Oak states that in his youth he was a great Pokémon Trainer, but now, he has three left. He's going to give Red and Blue one Pokémon each. "Choose wisely," Oak said.

**Author's Notes: Join us in Part Two, where the Eds actually choose their starter Pokémon. Look, I know that's a tease, but… Well, there is no "but." I'm not at all a nice person when it comes to storytelling.**

**For more information about **_**Ed's Game Room**_**, you can visit the "Ed's Game Room" thread on Earth 2 Edd. Additionally, you can view the "Ed's Game Room" page (which is under construction) on the Ed Fanon Wiki.**


	2. Why Can't I Catch a Ho-oh? 05

_Ed's Game Room_

The Eds Play _Pokémon Blue Version_ [Part Two]

"Why Can't I Catch A Ho-oh?!"

Written by thebestkindofstupid/Reginald Konga

**Author's Notes: I forgot to mention in the last chapter that the cover for this story was done by Kirbynat from DeviantArt. I said I would credit her, and, well, it's better late than never.**

**There was a major delay on this chapter. I record footage from the game onto a DVD-R or DVD+R before writing these stories, so I can always look back at what I did and joke in case I forgot. I took the two DVDs with the beginning footage of **_**Pokémon Blue Version**_**, a portable DVD player, and my laptop, so I could work on the story. I decided it was too stressful, but I left the DVDs in the car. By the time I got around to getting it back, it was snowing, so I could only get the second disc back, not the one with the beginning on it. That's the story of how I lost my street cred … just now. I lost it just now. Well, actually, I'll lose it when I post this chapter. Whatever.**

**I wish I'd looked at the footage more carefully last time. For some reason, Blue was facing the wrong way when Oak brought Red back to the lab. Speaking of which, I might have been a bit hasty when I decided to refer to the Protagonist of Pokémon Blue and the rival as Red and Blue, respectively. I think I will refer to them as EDDY and Kevin, respectively.**

The Eds now had to decide on a starter Pokémon. Double D started the discussion by saying, "So, which Pokémon are we getting? Squirtle?"

"As if!" Eddy yelled. "We're getting Charmander!"

"CHARMANDER!" Ed yelled, imitating Egoraptor.

"Now, hold on," Dave said. "I want Squirtle too, so it's a tie."

"You're not even playing," Eddy said.

"Yeah, well, I own all the games and gaming consoles, which means you're picking the Squirtle."

"Oh," Eddy said, "Well… I guess we're picking the Squirtle."

EDDY walks over to the table with the Pokémon.

"You'd better show them all off to give the audience the full effect," said Dave.

"How do I do that?" Eddy asked.

"Stand in front of them, press A, then say no. I can't believe I'm explaining this," Dave said.

EDDY looked at the Fire-Type Pokémon Charmander on the left side of the table. Professor Oak asked if he wanted it, but EDDY said no. EDDY then looked at the Water-type Pokémon Squirtle, and again chooses no. EDDY looked at the Grass- and Poison-Type Pokémon Bulbasaur. Yeah, there aren't many regular Grass types in Gen One. It's mostly Grass/Poison types.

Dave then said, "Do I want the Bulbasaur? Heck no! …"

"Is the Bulbasaur bad?" Ed asked.

"Well, Grass-types are underpowered in this game. Granted, Grass-type attacks are super-effective against Rock- and Ground-Type Pokémon, such as the ones Brock has, so it's a better start than Charmander, but you're going to have to get more than just one type of Pokémon anyway." Dave paused then continued, "You know it's funny: The worst starter in this game is super-effective against the first three gyms."

"Really?" Eddy asked.

"Well, since Electric-Type attacks are not very effective against Plant-Type Pokémon, I assume that Grass beats Electricity, but I could be wrong. You never know what kind of idiocy will occur in these games. After all, Gyarados is a Water-Flying-Type, not a Dragon Type, and they've never corrected it."

EDDY went back to the center of the table and selected "Yes" on the Squirtle.

"What are you gonna name it?" Dave asked.

"Name what?" Eddy asked.

"YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THAT YOU GIVE YOUR POKÉMON NICKNAMES?!" Dave bellowed.

"Um, yeah, I knew that." EDDY then named his Pokémon Jonny. "Jonny still owes me fifty cents for that King Triton ride, by the way."

Kevin then went up to the table and got the Bulbasaur. "Haha, you got the Bulbasaur," Dave taunted.

EDDY then spoke to Kevin, who said, "My Pokémon looks a lot stronger." EDDY briefly spoke to Oak. EDDY then tried to head to the door, but Kevin stopped him and demanded that they battle. A screen transition, well, transitioned to a different scene. As opposed to the standard top-down perspective, the player sees EDDY's back and Kevin from the front. "Kevin wants to fight!" "Kevin sent out BULBASAUR"

Dave then went on a huge spiel about common knowledge. You may skip this paragraph if you've already played Pokémon. "Okay, you have two moves. You can Tackle, which is a Normal-type attack with 100% accuracy (until later when pidgeys start using sand attack), but it's not very strong. You can also use Tail Whip, which lowers the Pokémon's defense, but it's useless, so ignore it. What you want to do is select Tackle over and over again. Your opponent will alternate between Tackle and Growl. Now instead of having Tail Whip or Leer to lower the opponent's defense, like Squirtle and Charmander, Bulbasaur uses Growl to lower your attack. It's still pretty useless, but I did lose to Blue once because he used Growl so many times my Pokémon's attack became a one-hit point attack. This was back when I traded the starters from Blue to Red Version in an attempt to get all the Pokémon."

"Can I play now?" asked an annoyed Eddy.

"Oh, sure," Dave said.

Squirtle used Tackle, and Bulbasaur used Growl. The fight went on for a minute or two. Eventually Squirtle's health went from 10 HP to 7 HP out of a maximum of 19 HP. "Oh, my gosh, are you actually going to have to use a potion…?" Dave asked. Squirtle did one last Tackle, and Bulbasaur fainted. Please note that Pokémon don't die, they faint. Dave or Eddy might say "die," but no one ever dies in Pokémon.

Kevin then said, "…I picked the wrong Pokémon!"

Back to the top-down perspective, Kevin said that he was going to level it up. EDDY spoke to Professor Oak, who just said to make the Squirtle stronger by "making it fight."

Dave then said, "Okay, go to your house––you know, in the game––and talk to your in-game mother. I think she might give you something."

EDDY went to his mother, but she just allowed EDDY and his Pokémon to rest, which healed them, much like a Pokémon Center. This did nothing as the starter Pokémon is healed after the first Rival Battle.

"Ope, I guess we healed our Pokémon for no reason. Oh, well."

"What a waste of time," Eddy said.

EDDY then went North of Pallet Town but quickly ran into a wild Pokémon. "Wild Rattata appeared." It should be noted that Dave and the author believe the correct pronunciation to be "Rah-TA-ta," but they often mispronounce the name as "Rat-ta-TA." I, of course, have no idea what the correct pronunciation is.

This is the part where the Eds and Dave tried to think of something creative to say but couldn't. Dave joked, "Look, the first wild battle in your––Never mind."

"What?" Double D asked.

Dave explained, "I'm embarrassed by how cliché my joke was going to be, so I don't want to say it anymore."

After making the Rattata faint, EDDY ran into a clerk from the PokéMart, who gives EDDY a potion. Dave then said, "I can imagine the player coming back here multiple times with different mustaches for multiple potions."

EDDY made a Pidgey faint on his way to Viridian City. Once there he visited the Pokémon Center. EDDY talked to the people in the Pokémon Center, but Dave informed the real Eddy that the PC is worthless until later in the game. The real Eddy was starting to get tired of talking to Townspeople. He healed his Pokémon and went North again. Unfortunately, a dru––; I mean, a man who hadn't had his coffee wouldn't let Eddy through.

"Yeah, this guy won't let you through until later," Dave said. "He's much nicer once he gets his coffee."

EDDY talks to some moron who gives his Pokémon lame nicknames. After being told by some kid in a cape that "My daddy likes Pokémon too," EDDY looks at a town map.

"Okay, in later games like _Pokémon Sapphire Version_ or _Pokémon Black Version_, you can move a curser around the map, but here you press up or down to cycle through locations. The towns are, pretty much, in the order you visit them, except for the Power Plant, which is last. I guess they wanted to make sure that if you didn't visit Viridian Forest, you wouldn't be capturing a Pikachu until the end of the game."

"So, we do visit all these places?' Eddy asked.

"Well, yeah," Dave said.

"So, this game's going to take more than five hours to beat."

Dave then started laughing his butt off at Eddy.

"Hooboy," Eddy said.

Later, EDDY visited the Pokémon school. He went up to the Blackboard after reading a student's notes. "You know what?" Dave said, "I'll save you some time." He then started speaking very fast, "There's status damage that takes place over several turns. There's Poison, Freeze, Burn, Paralysis, and Sleep. Paralysis is temporary damage, so don't go thinking it's permanent because it goes away when you return to the Pokémon Center. Poison and Burn do damage every turn, while Freeze and Sleep cause you to miss your turn. Paralysis has a chance of making you miss your turn. All of these conditions wear off after the battle ends, but a Pokémon who is confused will stop being confused as soon as it leaves the battle, even if you only switch it out of the battle for a brief moment."

Eddy commented, "Geez, what a mouth-full… again!"

"So, yeah, you need to use Antidote on poisoned Pokémon, burn heals on burns, freeze heals on frozen Pokémon, awakenings on sleeping Pokémon, and Paralysis heals on––actually, sleeping Pokémon have a chance of waking up on their own."

"That's a lot of feet," Ed said.

"Huh?" Dave asked.

"You said _heal_," Ed said.

"AUGGH! THE STUPID! IT BURNS!" Dave said with literal fire in his eyes.

EDDY eventually walked into the Poké Mart. The clerk stopped him and told him to deliver Professor Oak's parcel to, well, Professor Oak. "Why can't these guys deliver it themselves," asked the real Eddy.

"Because the game developers needed a reason to bring you back to Pallet Town for your PokéDex," Dave said.

"Why couldn't they give me the PokéDex at the beginning?" Eddy asked.

"I don't know. Do you honestly expect me to know everything…?" Dave asked.

EDDY jumped down ledges to get to Pallet Town. Eddy didn't see the ledge to the right of the grass near Pallet Town, so he had to fight another wild Pokémon, and, of course, another one during the unavoidable grass to the north of Pallet Town.

EDDY brought the Parcel to Professor Oak, who said it had the new Pokéball he ordered. "He must've ordered it from Hoenn," Dave remarked.

"Huh?" Eddy asked.

"If you'd played Gen Three, you'd know," Dave said.

Kevin barged into Oak's lab and asked why Oak called for him. "I guess he's been using that telephone option in Gen Two," Dave said.

Oak then states that he's always dreamed of making a complete guide to all 151 Pokémon, but now that he's an old geezer, he's going to force this dream on EDDY and Kevin, meaning that they have to use the PokéDex to automatically record data on all 151 Pokémon. Of course, it doesn't work unless you capture them.

After Dave finished explaining all of this to Eddy, Dave added, "After reading some of these dark and disturbing PokéDex entries, I'm convinced the computer just makes this stuff up. How else could it record data about the behavior of Pokémon?"

Kevin starts talking and the real Eddy says, "Oh, please tell me we don't have to battle him again."

"Not til later, Eddy," Dave said. "He's just informing you that he's going to force his sister not to give you a map, but she'll give it to you anyway. Also, he thinks you're trash!"

"Hey!" Eddy said.

"He said it, not me," Dave said.

"Next time I meet him, I'm really going to give it to him," Eddy said.

**Author's Notes: Wow, I got most of this chapter done in one sitting. Man, I can really get with it when I try.**

**Hopefully, you Charmander fans aren't too mad, right? Right?!**


	3. Zapdos as a Starter Pokémon 06

_Ed's Game Room_

The Eds Play _Pokémon Blue Version_ [Part Three]

"Zapdos as a Starter Pokémon" (#06)

Written by thebestkindofstupid/Reginald Konga

**Author's Notes: Despite being sick since yesterday morning, I still managed to get this story out today.**

**Story Thus Far: EDDY received his first Pokémon: the Water-type Squirtle.**

EDDY walked towards the door to exit Professor Oak's lab, but then he turned around.

"What are you doing?" asked Dave.

"I want to see if that last Pokémon is still there," Eddy said.

EDDY looked at the last Pokéball on the table. "That's Prof Oak's last Pokémon!"

"I guess Charmander will just have to sit there forever," Dave said.

"Aw, poor Charmander. Oh, well, he had a good run," said Ed.

EDDY walked out of Professor Oak's lab and then barged into Kevin's house. Kevin's sister gave EDDY the Town Map, which is actually a map of the entire Kanto Region.

EDDY looked in his PokéDex to see what it did. He saw that his Squirtle was one foot eight inches tall.

"Yeah, this was back when Pokémon sizes make sense. I still refuse to believe my Mudkip was the size of a frog."

"What's a Mudkip?" Eddy asked.

"The developers started putting new Pokémon in the sequels, and to answer your question more accurately, it's the best evolutionary line of Pokémon ever created."

EDDY walked into the tall grass north of Pallet Town, and encountered a wild Pokémon. "Oh, great, another Rattata," said Dave. "You know, you can run from wild encounters, right?"

"Really?' Eddy asked. EDDY got away from the Rattata safely.

"You won't get any experience points though," Dave said.

"What are experience points?" Ed asked.

Dave said, "You stupid!"

"No, I'm not," said Ed.

"What's nine plus ten?"

"Twenty-One?" Ed answered immediately.

"You stupid!" said Dave. "All right, Internet memes aside, if you get enough experience points, you'll level up. When you level up, your Pokémon's stats go up, and when your Pokémon's stats go up, your Pokémon becomes stronger."

EDDY fought another Pidgey on the way to the Viridian City Pokémon center. After healing his Pokémon, EDDY made his way to the Poké Mart. "You should probably get like seven Pokéballs. You're going to need them to catch your first Pokémon, cuz we're gonna catch Pikachu." He looked at the camera and said, "That's right, ladies and gentlemen, we're catching a Pikachu in Viridian Forest."

"Actually, Dave, there's only a 5% chance of running into a Pikachu."

"Yeah, but we're gonna have to train to beat Brock anyway. Might as well catch one. Besides, that's only like twenty bugs we'll have to fight. Thirty at the most."

"Actually, that doesn't mean we'll find one Pikachu every twenty wild encounters. That's a fallacy that needs to be broken. It could take us 60 or more wild encounters before––"

"It can't be that bad. I found one without even trying, and catching it wasn't even that hard."

"Listen, I don't want to waste any more time looking for rare Pokémon that we probably don't even need," Eddy yelled.

"Wait a second. Yep there it goes." Ed's brain then made a startling connection. "Pikachu's the mascot." Ed then started jumping on top of Eddy. "Oh, please, Eddy, can we have a Pikachu? Oh, please, Eddy, I want a Pikachu." He stopped jumping and said, "I _LOVE_ Pikachus Eddy!"

"I believe the plural for any species of Pokémon is the same as the singular, but I am glad to have another one on board for Pikachu."

"Actually, Eddy, now that I think about it, a Pikachu would make Misty's gym a lot easier."

"All right, all right, fine we can get a Pikachu." EDDY then talked to the clerk at the Poké Mart. "Sheesh, 1400 dollars?! Wait, what's that P for?"

"I think the money system in Pokémon is based on the Japanese currency of Yen, so instead of spending two hundred dollars on a Pokéball, you're actually spending about two dollars. Actually the exchange rate according to a Yu-Gi-Oh! manga volume was once $1700 to 200,000 Yen. You're probably right though. You probably don't need to spend that much right now. Just get five Pokéballs and avoid capturing any of the other worthless bug-type Pokémon. You could get a Mankey if you want, but it's probably easier just to stick with Squirtle."

EDDY purchased the five Pokéballs for 1000 Pokédollaresabobs. EDDY headed west and talked to some boring guy who tells us what we already know about Pokéballs. EDDY then heads North and talks to a girl who's probably related to that old man who's physically addicted to coffee. EDDY talked to the old codger, but Dave said, "No, you want to tell him that, yes, you are in a hurry. Otherwise, he'll give us a lame tutorial on catching Pokémon."

"Whew, thanks, Dave," Eddy said.

EDDY tried to get into the Viridian City gym, but it was locked. EDDY jumped down the ledge and headed North.

After Eddy walked into the building just before the forest, a kid told him that "Rattata may be small, but its bite is wicked. Did you get one?"

"I mean, we could get a Rattata," said Dave, "but I could also sell my soul to the ghost of Walt Disney. That doesn't mean it's logical."

EDDY talked to a girl who warned him that Viridian Forest is "a natural maze." EDDY walked into Viridian Forest anyway. Jonny learned Bubble after fighting a wild Caterpie. "Finally, a somewhat useful attack besides Tackle," said Dave. EDDY then picked up a Pokéball, which was right in front of just before the wild battle occurred.

A short while later, EDDY ran into his first Bug Catcher. Jonny used Bubble, but Weedle used Poison Sting, which poisoned Jonny. "Oh, darnit, now we're gonna have to waste a couple of Potions. I knew we should've bought some Antidote."

After the fight, the bug catcher with mental issues said, "You'll scare the bugs away." Man, what an idiot! EDDY started walking back to the Pokémon center when the screen flashed.

"What the heck was that?!" Eddy said.

"Yeah, that's what happens when you get poisoned in this game. It'll keep flashing until the Pokémon is cured of poison. It also happens with burns, I think."

EDDY walked out of Viridian Forest. "You know, I don't think I've ever seen the character black out because his one Pokémon fainted at the beginning of the game." EDDY walked a little ways, then he looked at his Pokémon with seven HP. Dave then said, "Let the screen flash two more times, then use the stupid Potion."

EDDY did so. Jonny went back to 25 HP. EDDY eventually made it to the Pokémon Center. EDDY then bought one Potion and one Antidote at the Poké Mart. EDDY went back to Viridian Forest.

"Yo!" said another Bug Catcher. "You can't jam out if you're a Pokémon trainer."

"Wow, what a weird thing to say," said Dave.

"Do they always have stupid things to say?" asked Eddy.

"Oh, yeah, just you wait," said Dave.

After defeating another Weedle, EDDY saw that the Bug Catcher sent out a Kakuna.

"Now, Eddy, Pokémon evolve after leveling up a certain degree. For example, that Kakuna evolved from a Weedle. You can catch evolved Pokémon, but it's generally better to catch them sooner than later because trainer Pokémon are stronger than wild Pokémon. Now, that Kakuna was probably caught as a Kakuna because it doesn't know Tackle. It can only use Harden, which increases its defenses."

"That's _some_ improvement," Eddy said.

"Well, most Pokémon evolutions are upgrades, but this was just supposed to be an tutorial on Evolution. You got a Caterpie evolving into a Metapod, which is almost exactly like a Kakuna, then it evolved into a Butterfree."

"That is remarkably lame," said Eddy. Dave sighed.

Jonny was at Level 10 after the fight.

A short while later, after Jonny had grown to Level 11 and EDDY had found a potion, EDDY spoke to another bug catcher, who sent out only one Level 9 Weedle. EDDY headed north and read a sign that said, "Now leaving Viridian Forest."

"Hold on," Dave said, "We can't leave just yet. We still need to catch our Pikachu."

"All right, fine," Eddy said.

"Just walk in the grass until a Pikachu shows up. You might want to start running away from battles soon because that Pikachu is only around Level 3."

"Is this going to take forever," Eddy asked.

"Tell you what. If we run into sixty Pokémon with no Pikachu in sight, you may leave Viridian Forest.

The video went into fast forward, and an 8-bit version of "Yakety Sax" could be heard.

"Oh, my gosh, you actually found one," said Double D.

"Yeah, and it only took 16 wild encounters," Ed proudly added.

"Are we recording this?" asked Double D.

"Uh, yeah, that's the whole point, sockhead," barked Eddy.

"All right, Tackle's probably best for this situation, so use that," Dave said.

"Don't baby me like that," Eddy said. Jonny tackled Pikachu, and Pikahu used Thundershock.

"Now what?" Eddy asked.

"Go to your items and select the Pokéball," Dave said, holding back his insults.

"EDDY used Pokéball."

After being thrown by EDDY, the Pokéball absorbed the Pokémon before falling to the ground. It wiggled once, twice, and thrice. Pikachu had indeed been caught.

"Yeah, that's what I'm talking about," said Dave.

A new PokéDex entry was recorded for Pikachu. "One foot four inches and 13.0 lbs," it said. Dave read the PokéDex entry out loud, "When several of these POKéMON gather, their electricity could build and cause lightning storms."

"Cool," said Ed.

"I would love to see that in action," said Dave.

The game then asked, "Do you want to give a Nickname to Pikachu?"

"Since this generation makes it unclear which gender your Pokémon is, how about you name it Nazz?" said Dave.

"Why would I want to do that?!" Eddy asked.

"You won't. You have a crush on her," Dave teased.

"No, I don't," Eddy said.

"Yes, you do," Dave said.

"No, I don't," Eddy said.

"Prove it then. Name it Nazz," Dave taunted.

"Fine," Eddy said.

"You'd better not spell her name in all caps," Dave said.

"I won't," said Eddy.

EDDY named the Pikachu Nazz. He walked out of the grass, paused the game and took a look at his current team. EDDY then walked through the tall grass towards the exit.

Thus, our heroes caught their first non-starter Pokémon. Will Nazz the Pikachu help them beat the Indigo Plateau? Only time will tell. Yep, that's pretty much how most episodes of Pokémon end.


	4. Sounds a Little Farfetch'd (07)

_Ed's Game Room_

The Eds Play _Pokémon Blue Version_ [Part Four]

"Level 103?! Sounds a Little Farfetch'd…" (#07)

Written by thebestkindofstupid/Reginald Konga

**Author's Notes: Today is the three-year anniversary of the creation of my fan fiction account. To celebrate, here's a new episode of **_**Ed's Game Room**_**.**

**There was originally going to be an episode of **_**The NEW Grim Edventures of Ed, Edd n Eddy**_** in place of this chapter, but then I realized… the episode in question was terrible. I somewhat feel I have a par of quality that I need to meet, and that episode simply didn't meet the golden standard.**

**I think I should clarify that I don't actually have a problem with people doing Nuzlocke runs or even Magikarp only runs. I do have a problem with people claiming that the pros will only play the game a certain way, as if to say most people are doing it wrong. You shouldn't have to restart the game over and over to get the correct nature because you're afraid people online will hassle. I don't see this happen an awful lot, but I still know that it goes on. You shouldn't give people a hard time if they're not good at a video game because video games are still pretty much just expensive toys. You're supposed to have fun with them. That's probably what I was trying to say earlier. If someone doesn't have a properly EV trained Delphox, just move along and let them be. Sheesh, that was a lot of explaining. I should probably avoid trying to make points in the future.**

**Story thus far: EDDY has made it to Pewter City with his Level 12 Squirtle and his newly caught Pikachu.**

EDDY walked into the Pewter City Pokémon Center and got his Pokémon back to full health. He walked to the west and into a house. After wasting some time with a little boy, EDDY walks up to a man. The man says Pokémon will learn many techniques as they grow, but some techniques must be taught by the player. Dave delivered a huge exposition dump. "Yeah, you can find these TMs, or Technical Machines, that teach Pokémon a specific move, but they can only be used once, so use them wisely. Hidden Machines, or HMs, can be used an infinite number of times, but some of them, like cut, are virtually useless in battle. You pretty much just use Cut to cut down trees outside of battle."

"Why don't we just use a chainsaw?" Ed asked.

"Because, Ed," Dave explained, "that would be too logical."

"Oh, well, I guess that makes sense," Ed said.

Dave swiftly covered his face with his palm.

EDDY exited the house and walked eastward. He found a guy in a garden. "Psssst! Do you know what I'm doing?" said the man.

"What's this guy's problem?" Eddy asked.

"He's using repels wrong," said Dave. "Just answer him."

EDDY answered no. "I'm spraying repels to keep Pokémon out of my garden," the man said.

EDDY read a sign in the garden. It read, "PEWTER CITY A stone gray city"

Eddy then said, "Gosh darnit, is there anything useful to read in this game?!"

Dave then said, "You're not going to get the full experience if you start skipping everything, so don't even think about it."

EDDY walked up to another man (or boy; it's kind of vague) who asked if he'd gone to the museum. EDDY answered no, so, of course, the guy _had_ to walked EDDY over to the museum.

"What's going on?!" Eddy asked.

"He drags you to the museum if you tell him you haven't seen the exhibits. A lot of people are angry at that other guy who takes you over to Brock if you try to advance without beating him. I'm more angry about this guy taking you to the dumb museum."

The guy said it's totally worth paying money. EDDY immediately walked away from museum door.

EDDY entered a Poké Mart. A man told him that you should raise all Pokémon with love, even the weak ones. Another boy, I guess––I don't know. It's kind of hard to tell. The boy or **whatever** tells him a con artist sold him a disgustingly weak Magikarp (Level 5, no less) for 500 Poké-dollars. EDDY looked at the selection of items he could buy.

"Okay, you're probably going to need about three potions," said Dave.

"Fine," said Eddy, "if it'll help me win the game."

Eddy bought the three potions for 900 Pokédollars. Dave then said, "You'll also need 2 antidotes."

Eddy started to select the two Antidotes, but then he stopped. "Nah," said Eddy, "I don't feel like it." EDDY walked off, prompting Dave to laguh his butt off.

A short while later, EDDY was in another house.

"Another kid in a cape?" Dave said as EDDY entered another housed.

"Nidoran sit," said the boy.

EDDY talked to man of the house, who claims that outsiders (Pokémon obtained through a trade) grow quickly (earn twice as much experience), but they become unruly without the proper gym badge.

Dave then said with a slight amount of sadness in his voice, "This scenario is a little bit sad. They thought it'd be nice to trade Pokémon like the _Red &amp; Blue_ commercials said, and now they're tearing apart his house."

"You do realized this is a game, right?" Double D asked.

"…" Dave didn't respond.

A short while later, EDDY attempted to get into the museum. The clerk stopped him and said he must pay. "Do I have to?" said the real Eddy.

"I don't know," said Dave. "You might get a TM."

EDDY relunctantly payed 50 Poké-dollars. He has 1345 left by the way.

EDDY spoke to a man with nothing important to say. EDDY looked at the Aerodactyl fossil, which appeared on screen in a text box. EDDY also looked at the Kobutops fossil, which appeared on screen in a similar fashion. EDDY went upstairs. An elderly lady said she remembered the first lunar landing in July 20, 1969. A little girl said she wants a Pikachu. Dave then said, "How cute. We have one. Too bad we won't be trading it to you any time soon."

"You can trade with NPCs?" Ed asked.

"Yeah, but they hardly ever have anything worth trading for."

The father said he'll get her one soon. "Oh, so you don't get a TM," said Dave.

"I paid fifty dollars for nothing.?!" Eddy said enraged.

"Actually, it's fifty yen, but yes, it was a complete waste of time," Dave answered. He then grumbled, "Stupid jerk forcing us to visit the museum. Exquisite, my foot."

"Why would they even put it in the game?" Double D asked.

"Well, later on, you can cut down a tree or bush or whatever, get into the secret entrance, and this guy will give you an amber. You can later revive an Aerodactyl from this amber. Man, I sound like a Wikipedia page."

Moments later, EDDY was outside the museum. "All right," said Dave, "let's go level grinding for Brock. Find some grass south of here, and start leveling up your Pikachu with wild encounter victories." EDDY put Nazz up front. "Yeah, we're probably going to cut this part out," said Dave.

After a considerable amount of time later, Nazz was now Level 8, but Jonny the Squirtle was still Level 12.

"All right, I think that's enough grinding for now," said Dave.

"'Bout Time," Eddy said. "So you think our Pikachu can beat Brock now?"

Dave then said, "Dude, Pikachu is completely ineffective against Ground- and Rock-Types. You use Squirtle against Brock."

Enraged, Eddy then asked, "What? Why'd you tell me to level up my Pikachu then?"

"Well, later on in Cerulean City, you have to level up your Pikachu with only a few different Pokémon to battle. Would you rather do part of that training now or later?"

"Dave's right, Eddy, there's no reason to procrastinate," Double D said, "even if we are playing video games."

Eddy then grunted, "Errgh."

After going to the Pokémon Center one last time, EDDY started heading east. "Where's that Pokémon Gym again?"

Just as EDDY was leaving Pewter City, an NPC stopped him and started dragging him to Brock.

"What is with these people?! Dragging me to places I don't even want to––Oh, we're here at the Pokémon Gym," said Eddy.

"These game developers think of everything. Aren't they just swell?" Dave joked.

"Tell me a story, Dave," Ed said.

"Dude, I saw a collection of sad moments from the _Pokémon_ anime online the other day. It turns out Gary didn't pick the Charmander. It belonged to this moron who was using it against Water-Types. So, this idiot told his Charmander to wait for him on a rock… in the woods… _in the rain_ and never came back. Like, forget everything you know about Pokémon typing. What would make this guy think his fire lizard could win against Water-type monsters. I mean, really? In this world, he wouldn't be qualified to say 'Paper or Plastic?'"

"You tell him, Dave," Ed said.

"Hey, would you guys shut up about the anime?! I'm trying to play a game here!" Eddy commanded them.

Double D then said, "Actually, Eddy, if you go to the right, you'll see the game developers didn't think of everything."

EDDY then walked to the right to see a solid fence blocking the only exit the NPC could've taken. Dave then said, "He didn't go in the gym; he went to the right, and there's a fence just off-screen. Where'd he go?!"

"You guys are nerds," Eddy said, as if it made sense to program the game like that.

EDDY then entered the gym. "So, I just walk up to Brock or…?"

"Read that statue first," Dave said.

EDDY went down and to the left to look at the statue. "Pewter City Pokémon Gym," it read, "Leader: Brock. Winning Trainers: Kevin."

Eddy was surprised. He said, "Oh, what the heck?! He beat this gym before we did?!"

"He beats every gym before you do, dude," Dave said, smiling.

"What's this guy over here gonna do?" Eddy said, referring to a man to the right of the east statue.

"Just say yes to his question," Dave said.

The NPC, who shall henceforth be referred to as the Manager, asked if EDDY would like him to be, well, a manager. The manager will give EDDY advice on winning Pokémon fights against gym leaders. EDDY agreed.

"What did I agree to?" Eddy asked.

"He's just going to be your manager now," Dave replied.

"Hey, what's this gonna cost me?" Eddy asked, greatly annoyed.

"It's free, and he'll give you advice on how to win," said Dave.

"Oh," Eddy said, relieved and a little embarrassed, "that sounds nice."

EDDY walked towards Brock, but he stopped at the sight of another man, whose line of sight was blocking his way. EDDY then went left into a different hallway to walk around the guy. He had quickly figured out how to fight Brock without bothering with the other guy, and it would've felt nice if EDDY actually existed.

The real Eddy asked, "Hey, do I have to fight this guy?"

"Uh, you probably should for experience points."

"Fine," said Eddy.

"Stop right there, kid!" the NPC said, "You're still light years from facing Brock!" It was a male Jr. Trainer. He sent out a Level 11 Diglett.

"Like I said, switch to Jonny," said Dave.

EDDY switched to Jonny, who defeated the Diglett with only two uses of "Bubble." The game said that the Jr. Trainer was about to send out Sandshrew and asked the player if he would like to switch Pokémon. Eddy opted to switch to Nazz the Pikachu to get experience.

"Oh, what, you're switching to Pikachu?" Dave asked in disbelief.

"Yeah, I thought this was a good strategy," said Eddy.

"Not when one Pokémon knocked off half your HP." Indeed, Jonny had 16 out of a maximum of 34 Hit Points. "Look," Dave said as Sandshrew used Scratch to shave off another 6 HP, "Now you're down to low health."

Jonny used Tackle, and Sandshrew used Scratch. "Oh, what, you used Tackle?"

"YOU WERE MAKING ME NERVOUS!" Eddy yelled.

"Now, you're down to 4 HP," said Dave. "You'd better have a potion." Eddy pulled up a potion. "Oh, good," Dave said, relieved. Eddy used the Potion to restore 20 HP. Sandshrew used Sand Attack. "Oh, gosh," said Dave.

"What?" Double D asked.

"I'm worried he's going to use Sand Attack over and over until your Pokémon has such low accuracy that it's worthless."

Jonny used Bubble, and Sandshrew used Scratch. "Okay, maybe it's not so bad." Jonny used Bubble again, but it missed. Sandshrew used Sand Attack.

"Oh, dear, this is how it starts," said Dave.

"Stop messing up my game," Eddy demanded.

Jonny successfully used Bubble, and Sandshrew used Sand attack. Sandshrew was now at low HP. Jonny used Bubble again. "See? I still won," said Eddy as the Bubble animation was on the screen.

"Woah," said everyone in the room. The low-pitched part of the victory melody played, and the higher-pitched part of the victory melody played a few seconds later.

Dave then said, "It's like they had two different instruments, and one of them started like three seconds later."

"I don't want to hear this anymore," Ed said.

Eddy skipped through the Jr. Trainer's words on how Light Years actually measures distance instead of time. "That was weird," said Eddy. "Well, I guess we need to battle Brock."

"Hold on," said Dave. "Go back to the Pokémon Center. You don't want to fight Brock while you're weak."

Eddy then said, "Good idea. Wait, doesn't that make this other guy kind of pointless?"

Dave then said, "Pretty much. Also, we're going to have to do more grinding."

"Aw, darn," said Eddy.

After a little bit more grinding in the patch of grass just south of Pewter City, Jonny the Squirtle was now Level 15. EDDY returned to the Gym.

Dave then said, "You'd better save before you take on Brock. You lose half your money if all your Pokémon faint."

"Oh, I guess you're right."

When Eddy paused the game to save, he noticed that game data said he had been playing for one hour and 28 minutes. "Have we really been playing for an hour and a half?" Eddy asked, shocked.

Dave bursted out laughing and then said, "Oh, you don't know the half of it."

"Oh, dear," Eddy said.

Brock then delivered his short speech, "I'm BROCK! I'm PEWTER's GYM LEADER! I believe in rock hard defense and determination! That's why my Pokémon are all the rock-type! Do you still want to challenge me? Fine then! Show me your best!"

"He didn't use on period that whole time he was talking."

"Really?" Double D asked.

"There was one question mark, but all the others were exclamation marks and commas."

"NERD!" Eddy said.

"Man, this is some good music," said Dave.

"When does the battle start? Oh, I have to press A."

The Eds' first gym battle then began.

Eddy took one look at Brock's in-battle sprite and said, "Sheesh, put a shirt on!"

EDDY sent out Jonny the Squirtle, and Brock sent out Geodude.

Jonny used Water Gun. It was a critical hit and super effective. Geodude went down in one hit.

"Man, that Pokémon went down like Cardboard," said Dave.

Eddy declined to switch Pokémon, and Brock sent out a Level 14 Onix. Onix used Screech to lower Jonny's defenses, but Jonny got another critical super effective with Water Gun. Jonny grew to Level 16.

"Man, we whipped the stuff out of Brock," said Dave.

Brock's in-battle losing speech went on long. He presented the Boulder Badge while still in-battle.

"Took us for granted? You mean we mopped the floor with you?" said Dave.

"What? Jonny is evolving!" said the game.

"What the heck is this?!" Eddy asked.

"Squirlte's evolving into Wartortole. Don't you remember my speech about Weedle and Caterpie Evolving?"

"Don't tell me he's turning into a Caccoon," said Eddy.

"Jonny evolved into Wartortle!"

"Is this a good thing?" Eddy asked.

Dave sighed. "Yes, Eddy. His stats are much higher now."

The game returned to a top-down perspective, and Brock also gave EDDY the TM Bide, which is useless.

At this point, Eddy was skipping through all the dialogue.

"Do you think we'll use that TM, Dave?" asked Double D.

Dave then said, "Nope, it makes your Pokémon hold still for two turns, and then pays back twice the damage the user took. Of course, most Pokémon battles in the single player experience are over in two or three turns, so, yeah, it's useless." EDDY walked towards the exit. Dave then said, "Hold on. Our audience wants to hear what that manager has to say."

"Sheesh, you're such a slave driver."

"Just as I thought! You're POKéMON champ material!" said the Manager.

Eddy then said, "Yeah, I'm sure our fans wanted to hear that."

Dave then said, "Yep, we've just conquered our first Gym Leader. Tune in next time when we head to Mt. Moon. We'll see you then."

**Author's Notes: I assure you Double D will actually play the game in the next chapter. I just wanted to do the Tutorial stuff with Eddy. Why? I don't know.**

**I'm not sure if I'll do the first chapter of **_**Crash Bandicoot 2 Cortex Strikes Back**_** next, or if I'll continue with Mt. Moon. So, yeah, be on the lookout for a new story regrading Ed's Game Room unless I just happen to do another **_**Pokémon**_** chapter. You know what I mean.**

**Also, you can check out the **_**Ed's Game Room**_** page on Ed Fanon Wiki. There's not much there, but it will be helpful if you guys ever want to know when a chapter was released.**


End file.
